comments - l love my wife

we enter an interesting phase in this blogwriting where i get interesting comments from the readers. so interesting in fact that i will time and again try to post them as a new blog and try to comment on the comment. i am hoping that this will encourage discussion on this blog and perchance thru these discussions come emergent ideas which will be worthy of another blog or two. so share your ideas, write them in the comments section and let us discuss with the passion of enemies while remaining under the banner of friendship.

here's one such comment from someone who wishes to be anonymous. she writes:

i know that just because guys think chivalry is dead past courtship doesn't mean they don't care about the girl anymore but the question is why do they forget the small things they used to do just because they're facing the bigger things like you said? is it just one or the other; is it so hard to do both? just a girl wondering =o


dear miss anonymous:
It's really not a mere case of forgetting the "lesser" in favor of the "greater". Times do change and all the while that we seem to "leave" one good trait behind, we pick up others which are even better. while I am tempted to say that, yes it is hard to learn new tricks while retaining old ones, this is a rather simplistic generalization that does not show the fine points of the arguments we make. i'm sure our lady readers would just love to pounce on that generalization and tear it to shreds :-). Oh no, no... sorry to burst your bubblegum, I won't make that blunder. I must just first toss the question back to the ladies. For the life of me I cannot understand why ladies have to nitpick about the acts of caring that we show? "Oh, he does this but he doesn't do that anymore" it's as if each act of care should be perceived as different from the other. why can't it be that the complexity of the caring project be retained in a dialectic synthesis of words and acts instead of a reductivistic analysis that sees each act and judges each act as a success or failure? In other words, don't miss the forest for the trees!!!